Episode #10: Ang Labo Mo Naman!!
04 February 2010
I was down on all fours – peeking under the table – trying to unplug the laptop – not realizing that my big ‘rear-view’ was in full view to everyone in the resto . . .
HER: Ano ba?!? . . . WHAT are you doing?!? . . . Let the waiters do that na lang kasi!
ME: I'm okay . . . I’m not too fat to bend over . . . (Sexy naman ako ah . . . eh . . . 10 years ago . . . heh heh.)
HER: Well . . . uhmmm . . . . WHATEVER!! . . . (Hay naku – ang lakas ng imagination nito!)
We were still laughing at ourselves as I finally managed to yank the plug out of the socket . . .
The Bratinella had just delivered her seminar for entrepreneurs . . . Out-of-the-box . . . Unconventional . . . Straight-to-the-Point . . . Bulls-eye . . . Clear + Precise + Concise . . . PRACTICAL WISDOM . . . Usable + Do-Able!
As we chatted in her car, the Bratinella popped her favorite question . . .
HER: So . . . what are your insights from today?
ME: Kakaiba ka talaga . . . what a way to conduct a seminar!
HER: What do you mean??
ME: There was never a dull moment . . . especially every time you waved your Magic Wand . . . WINNER – ‘FGM’ FairyGodMother ka talaga!
HER: True! . . . I gotta use my magic wand on them . . . they’re s-o-o-o ‘utak tsubibo’!
ME: Mwahaha – funny ka – why ‘tsubibo’?
HER: Parang ferris wheel sa carnival . . . going in circles but getting nowhere!
ME: Pati nga ako nahilo eh . . . and I’m not even the trainor!!
HER: Kasi naman – akala nila if they memorize and recite their long jargonic materials they’ll get rich! . . . Ano yan – class recitation sa Mababang Paaralan ng Barrio Sprikitik?? . . . H-e-l-l-o-o-o-o-o . . . WAKE UP, PEOPLE! . . . That’s NOT the way to make money!
ME: Mwahaha!!
HER: Teka – mamaya ka na tumawa . . . meron pa!!
(Naku – nagumpisa na ang mommy koh . . .)
HER: Hoy, pay attention to me . . . Ano’ng tinatawatawa mo diyan, ? . . . As I was saying – they have powerpoint presentations with dancing lights and ‘zit-zat-zoot-wham-bang’ effects . . . They think that’s the magic formula?!?
(She was on a roll . . . I couldn’t stop her.)
HER: Information overload . . . nothing relevant - or significant - or remarkable - or memorable for the listeners . . . WALA – ‘buti pa they just hand out flyers and leave!
ME: Oo nga . . . parang “hmmm . . . nice, but I don’t need to buy it”.
HER: Ay naku . . . ANG LABO NILA! . . . ‘Projecting intelligent’ won’t turn their s-u-p-e-r-c-a-l-i-f-r-a-g-i-l-i-s-t-i-c-e-x-p-i-a-l-i-d-o-c-i-o-u-s words into MONEY!
ME: Right!
HER: And they’re not even credible . . . ‘In-Credible’ – parang they just want to get your money.
ME: Come to think of it . . .
HER: Simple lang yan Peter . . . People should be the showcase of what they’re selling . . . Like, if you're into skin care, dapat hindi ‘rocky road’ ang mukha mo!
ME: Flawless face . . . uy – like you! . . . heh heh . . . Diba that’s what they call you in your TV and Radio shows when the spotlights go ON? . . . ‘Nakasisilaw Na Puti . . . Kutis Porselana’ . . . . CONFIDENCE!
HER: Hehe . . . Your audience will DESIRE what you’re selling because they see it in you!
ME: That’s true . . . what a loser if someone is selling a Weight Loss program – but he’s 20 pounds overweight!
HER: Mwahahaha . . . BULLS-EYE ka diyan! . . . But you know, let’s help them . . . WE – that’s Me and You!
ME: Uy . . . BRATINELLA and ME? (Ayos . . . gusto ko ‘to!)
HER: YES . . . Ganito – let’s do this . . .
(Rolling her eyes - with matching cute pout on her cute lips . . .)
HER: Enough of theories . . . I will give entrepreneurs – and those who want to GO into Negosyo – my personal recipe for how to SHOW AND TELL what their products and services can do.
ME: You will give your secret away – talaga??
HER: Yes – why not!. . . “My CPC RECIPE: How To Be Clear, Precise and Concise”.
ME: Exciting . . . when?
HER: Soon – as in VERY SOON . . . if you like nga eh – NOW NA!
I can't wait for that to happen! How 'bout you?.... ABANGAN!
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